Ask ten different people their opinions on the traits or characteristics that make a great or “successful” trainer – in this case, a strength coach, a personal trainer – and you’re bound to get ten different answers and iterations.
5 traits of a “successful” coach
Some people will use adjectives like strong, appears to be up to the task, experienced, competent, professional, motivating, or “destroy the back of my freaking pants”.”
Others will use less German markers like soon he will have an epic beard, or sleeps with a copy of SuperTraining under his pillow at night.
All are important (some more than others) and all can be used to describe many strength coaches – or any a sort of trainer in fact.
This should go without saying, but this list is not exhaustive.
Today, however, I would like to address some less obvious traits that I believe make a great strength trainer and/or personal trainer. Some are based on my own personal experiences, while others fall into the “it’s true because it’s my blog and because I said so” camp.
1. Coach’s Coach
Seems like an obvious place to start, right? But I’m surprised to see how many “coaches” don’t train anyone.
As always.
This is the paradox of this technological era in which we live. The Internet has made everyone an expert or an authority simply because 1) they say so and/or 2) because the number of followers = the pantheon of expertise.
Having thousands of followers on Twitter or Instagram is impressive. Whenever so many people are interested in what you have to say, you obviously do something RIGHT.
But don’t call yourself a coach or an “expert” if you’re not actually coaching people.
And this is where things get a little murky and the weeds get a little taller.
This is not to disrespect or devalue those who earn their living online. I understand. We live in the 21st century and, if nothing else, the pandemic has taught us that we must be ready, willing and able to turn to the online space in times of need.
I have many friends and colleagues who are very successful at coaching people remotely:
- This way they can help more people.
- They get results for people.
- I cannot deplore it.
I do it too.
However, I also spend 15-20 hours per week in my studio coaching athletes and clients in person. This remains very important to me. This keeps me fresh and in touch with my coaching skills. And I can guarantee that many of the online coaches who are crushing it were the FIRST to do it with in-person coaching. If you can’t coach a deadlift in person, the likelihood that you can do it over a WiFI connection with someone hundreds of miles away is pretty slim.
Besides, if I’m going to sit here and write blog posts and articles about how to train people, I better practice what I preach.
But that’s just me, I can’t speak for everyone.
That’s a level of integrity I’m not willing to give up.
2. Adopt your coaching style
I always get a sense of entertainment when other coaches come and watch me coaching. I think many are surprised to recognize that I am quite docile in my approach.
Of course, I will liven up, turn up the music and energize people when necessary and justified. But for the most part, I’m as laid back as possible. What can I say…
…this is my inner introvert living is the best life.
To be clear: No one – trainers, pirates, plane pilots, orcs – is 100% introverted or extroverted. We are all a mixture of both. What I find unfortunate is that it’s the more introverted side of the spectrum that tends to cause societal consternation.
via GIPHY
Introversion is often perceived as a feeling of distance or, even worse, as weakness. When all this really means is that some people are mentally exhausted in more social environments and need a little more help. cat cuddles “It’s time for me” to recharge.
As such, those who are more introverted are often forced to be something they are not…to the detriment of their comfort level, happiness, and ability to not throw their face against a brick wall.
extroversion – although having its own set of advantages and disadvantages – is considered a strength and favored trait in our society.
We introverts have a tone to offer as coaches – we tend to be better listeners and are more patient than an example. I encourage anyone who falls into this camp to embrace their introversion, understand that compromises will of course have to be made (read my article linked above), and that preferring to spend time with a book on Friday evening is total. boss status.
3. Pull Coaching vs. Push Coaching
This has been highlighted several times in recent years – notably by figures like Nick Winkelman And Brett Barthélemy – the power of using EXTERNAL cues (as opposed to using internal cues) when coaching – especially when working with beginner or intermediate level lifters.
To summarize:
Internal indices = Specific bodily actions or what it does in space.
External cues = Intention, distance or action.
Exercise Internal mark External benchmark
1. “Chest up” deadlift. “Show me the logo on your shirt.”
2. Squat “on your knees.” “Spread the word.”
3. Bench press “Arch your back”. “Meet the bar halfway.”
4. Sprint “Extend your hip.” “Push the ground back.”
The external cue tends to have more “sticky” power and resonates more with most lifters. Nick Tumminello has a nice way of saying it:
“Speak to the customer, not to the trainer”
To take it a step further, I really like the idea of “Pull” coaching versus “Push” coaching – a concept I stole from my good friend and colleague. Tony Bonvechio.
Pull-up coaching = Help someone solve their own problems…listen to understand, ask questions, paraphrase, suggest options.
Extensive coaching = Solve someone’s problems for them… tell, instruct, give advice.
Both scenarios are effective and have their time and place. However, I would argue that we need more of the former than the latter. As a coach, I want to EDUCATE my athletes and clients to be their best selves; to understand if I’m not there. I don’t want them to have to rely on me to All.
As:
- When to add weight to a given exercise.
- When to tone down their workouts and when to push themselves further.
- How to perform simple exercise substitutions if equipment availability is a problem.
- Understand why burpees (and kipping pull-ups) are downright stupid.
- And do I really need to remind you to g0 Watch Beef on Netflix? FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!!
You know, the important things.
I think far too many coaches and personal trainers push over pull. Strive to empower your customers by making them more competent and encouraging more autonomy (making their own choices).
4. Insatiable desire to improve
Dan John sits in the front row every time he attends a workshop or seminar. Mike Boyle still attends many events every year and is never afraid to back down or admit when he’s wrong. Ali Gilbert it’s the same. Eric Cressey just bragged the other day that he listened to 25 books on Audible this year.
In 2x speed (the psychopath).
All have decades of coaching experience and all are silent strive to improve.
Who the hell are you?
You got it all, right? No need to keep learning from others, right? Is it YOUR way or the highway? Is everyone stupid? Got it.
A hole.
5. Let’s stop with the “grinding” and “hustling”
Even though it’s a little more toned down now, I’m so tired of seeing stuff like that.
We see them all the time on social media.
The “crushers”.
The ones who are so busy and so overwhelmed and have so much more work ethic than everyone else.
Look, I can appreciate people who have a work ethic. And I’ll be the first to defend hard work and the idea that nothing happens without some degree of sacrifice, discomfort, and inconvenience. And yes, long hours.
But please save us the inspirational quotes and grandstanding because you got up before 5 a.m. two days in a row or, I don’t know, you haven’t eaten carbs since March.
Grinding is four tours of duty in Iraq and Afghanistan. Grinding is raising a child as a single parent. The grinding goes through intensive chemotherapy and silent put a smile on your face. Grinding is listening to your coworker brag about his CrossFit workouts and trying to keep your eyes from popping out of their sockets every time he waxes poetic about how you’re going to die tomorrow for drinking a Diet Coke.
He has Nothing to do with your superiority because you avoid seed oils or because you train eight clients a day, six days a week.
Speaking of which:
To the “climbers and grinders”… I love the work ethic, but there are only so many hours per week that you are an emotional coach.
You are not the same coach at the end of the day as you were at the beginning. You are not the same coach at the start and end of a week. Touting early wake-up times and hustle mentality isn’t the long-term flexibility you think.
It’s no coincidence that most trainers/trainers quit after two years. They inevitably hate life.
I understand that bills need to be paid, and I want to reiterate that I also understand that there will be a window of time where long hours will be spent. But know that there are only so many hours you can be an emotional coach and you will inevitably burn out.
There is a healthy balance and I hope you can find it.